Monday, September 7, 2009

Boolean Bozoism #13: Labor Day Edition

There’s an old saying: With great power comes great responsibility. There’s another one: With greater hit count comes greater numbers of bizarre search phrases. As Pottersville enjoyed a fairly good month from a hit count standpoint, the sheer number of inane search phrases also multiplied. What follows are the ones collected just between today and the middle of August:

what is the trick to figure out what day of the week it is
my snake's injured her jaw
put the lotion in the basket analysis
is preska a jewish name (Who was this, Mel Gibson?)
how to address a group of attorneys in a letter (How about, “Dear vampires who shamelessly suck on human misery…”?)
how can michael moore blame bush when obama is in office (Exactly! It’s not as if we don’t reset our memories and restart history with a new administration or that there’s any such thing as cause and effect.)
mother fucker what big brass
review of william griggs homosexuality (Uh, William, is there something you’d like to share with the rest of the class?)
fuching ginecology
apology letter from a hairdresser to client (“…therefore, in summation, I again apologize for the tragic mishap but what were the odds of my sneezing while holding a pair of scissors?”)
who are the 47000000 uninsured in the united states (Let’s see: A. Aaronson, Aaron Abrams… this may take a while…)
how to pull the rod from a card catalog
jizzhut accident fuck
guy drew dick jeopardy

Then there are those inquisitive, manly souls who are really, really inquisitive about the fine art of cocksuckery:

WHAT MAKES A GOOD COCKSUCKER (A saintly tolerance for lobbyists?)
professional cock sucker salary (Which is nothing compared to the exercised stock options.)
gay educated cock suckers (Well, if you’re going to learn, learn at the feet of the best.)
michele bachmann sucking cock (Sorry to disappoint but Michele does demonstrate her technique right here.)
north bergen blowjobs (Nice to know that Hal Turner’s picked up a trade in prison.)
barney frank sucks cock (Probably the same guy holding this sign.)
cocksuckers supreme (Is that the most expensive pizza at Jizz Hut?)

As always, Pottersville is well-read by those who live south of the Mason Dixon line and the Midwest:

boy jurks off looking at sister fucking black man (The nurve of those fucking purvs.)
amture white fucking a bid black dick (One has to wonder if he meant to type “amateur” or “mature.” But both, admittedly, involve unappealing scenarios.)
blackmen fucking white woman violently
do negroes have big dicks
married mom big tits fucking black boys niggers
black people are dangerous
gladney nigger

As usual, Pottersville involuntarily caters to the needs of those whose interests tend, shall we say, to the exotic:

pigboy sex (Interestingly, when you do a Google image search, these images show up. Go figger.)
double jointed porn stars
dominican boy prostitution (I didn’t know that Rush Limbaugh had heard of this site.)
limbaugh dies fat (Well, how else would he die?)
bool dog fucking girl
gay black yellow bones
fine yellowbones fucked and suck
welcome to the fuck shot world (Is that supposed to be a tautology?)
someone puting on a condom on his own dick (The instructions weren’t enough? You need a fucking video tutorial?)
possible gay poll questions (Such as, “Are you now, or have you ever been, Mark Foley?”)
Did Glenn Beck's mother kill her self because she caught him sexually abusing small boys ? (That is heinous. We know for a fact that Glenn Beck only rapes almost fully-grown girls.)
lisa ann welcomes the groom into the family by screwing his brain outs (Believe it or not, this is the title to an actual porno movie but how Pottersville got a hit from it is anyone’s guess.)

As one would expect, the passing last month of Senator Edward M. Kennedy didn’t go unnoticed by those keenly intent on memorializing the liberal lawmaker’s life and career:

why so many officials dying of brain cancer, conspiracy
who the hell is ted kennedy that he deserves such attention
edward kennedy despicable fat shit
celebrat kennedy motherfucker's death
shit head kennedy

Do I or do I not have a credible case in suspecting the next three search phrases came from John Yoo?

inquisition testikles
testicle brutalization
extreme cock balls torture gay

Then there are those who seem to think that Google is a men’s room wall. Now if only they left the usual phone numbers…

sara sucks cock in wv
loni fucks rodney moore

Then, as usual, there are those who are making God Himself regret ever inventing silicon:

in what why you welcome the famous personality in good words in a show
mother fuckers names
Gingrey Congress prick notice his self serving speach on hearings on health care (Fortunately, I grade on effort and not so much on spelling or coherence.)
donky fauck boy
animal crossing wild world +accidentally sold tissue box to tom nook how do I get it back?
chines fuck for back
shower pan hot mop in Woodbury, MN
"fuck the farmers" latin translation

And the winners for the three scariest search phrases of the summer are:

an old computer game where you went on a killing spree there where clowns and a sink full of blood
embarrassing rectal thermometer experiences
civil war II where will white homeland be?


At September 8, 2009 at 9:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why did Glenn Bech(Original German Spelling)kil herself? Because she was Glenn's Mother!

At September 9, 2009 at 5:18 AM, Blogger Jill said...

Wow, you get the most innnnnteresting people! It's also useful to note the number of searches you get by people fascinated by black-on-white sex. Kind of explains the "birthers", doesn't it.


Post a Comment

<< Home

KindleindaWind, my writing blog.

All Time Classics

  • Our Worse Half: The 25 Most Embarrassing States.
  • The Missing Security Tapes From the World Trade Center.
  • It's a Blunderful Life.
  • The Civil War II
  • Sweet Jesus, I Hate America
  • Top Ten Conservative Books
  • I Am Mr. Ed
  • Glenn Beck: Racist, Hate Monger, Comedian
  • The Ten Worst Music Videos of all Time
  • Assclowns of the Week

  • Links to the first 33 Assclowns of the Week.
  • Links to Assclowns of the Week 38-63.
  • #106: The Turkey Has Landed edition
  • #105: Blame it on Paris or Putin edition
  • #104: Make Racism Great Again Also Labor Day edition
  • #103: A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Toilet edition
  • #102: Orange is the New Fat edition
  • #101: Electoral College Dropouts edition
  • #100: Centennial of Silliness edition
  • #99: Dr. Strangehate edition
  • #98: Get Bentghazi edition
  • #97: SNAPping Your Fingers at the Poor edition
  • #96: Treat or Treat, Kiss My Ass edition
  • #95: Monumental Stupidity double-sized edition
  • #94: House of 'Tards edition
  • #93: You Da Bomb! edition.
  • #92: Akin to a Fool edition.
  • #91: Aurora Moronealis edition.
  • #90: Keep Your Gubmint Hands Off My High Pre'mums and Deductibles! edition.
  • #89: Occupy the Catbird Seat/Thanksgiving edition.
  • #88: Heil Hitler edition.
  • #87: Let Sleeping Elephants Lie edition.
  • #86: the Maniacs edition.
  • #85: The Top 50 Assclowns of 2010 edition.
  • #(19)84: Midterm Madness edition.
  • #83: Spill, Baby, Spill! edition.
  • #82: Leave Corporations Alone, They’re People! edition.
  • #81: Hatin' on Haiti edition.
  • #80: Don't Get Your Panties in a Twist edition.
  • #79: Top 50 Assclowns of 2009 edition.
  • #78: Nattering Nabobs of Negativism edition.
  • #77: ...And Justice For Once edition.
  • #76: Reading Tea Leaves/Labor Day edition.
  • #75: Diamond Jubilee/Inaugural Edition
  • #74: Dropping the Crystal Ball Edition
  • #73: The Twelve Assclowns of Christmas Edition
  • #72: Trick or Treat Election Day Edition
  • #71: Grand Theft Autocrats Edition
  • #70: Soulless Corporations and the Politicians Who Love Them Edition
  • Empire Of The Senseless.
  • Conservative Values for an Unsaved World.
  • Esquire's Charles Pierce.
  • Brilliant @ Breakfast.
  • The Burning Platform.
  • The Rant.
  • Mock, Paper, Scissors.
  • James Petras.
  • Towle Road.
  • Avedon's Sideshow (the new site).
  • At Largely, Larisa Alexandrovna's place.
  • The Daily Howler.
  • The DCist.
  • Greg Palast.
  • Jon Swift. RIP, Al.
  • God is For Suckers.
  • The Rude Pundit.
  • Driftglass.
  • Newshounds.
  • William Grigg, a great find.
  • Brad Blog.
  • Down With Tyranny!, Howie Klein's blog.
  • Wayne's World. Party time! Excellent!
  • Busted Knuckles, aka Ornery Bastard.
  • Mills River Progressive.
  • Right Wing Watch.
  • Earthbond Misfit.
  • Anosognosia.
  • Echidne of the Snakes.
  • They Gave Us a Republic.
  • The Gawker.
  • Outtake Online, Emmy-winner Charlotte Robinson's site.
  • Skippy, the Bush Kangaroo
  • No More Mr. Nice Blog.
  • Head On Radio Network, Bob Kincaid.
  • Spocko's Brain.
  • Pandagon.
  • Slackivist.
  • WTF Is It Now?
  • No Blood For Hubris.
  • Lydia Cornell, a very smart and accomplished lady.
  • Roger Ailes (the good one.)
  • BlondeSense.
  • The Smirking Chimp.
  • Hammer of the Blogs.
  • Vast Left Wing Conspiracy.
  • Argville.
  • Existentialist Cowboy.
  • The Progressive.
  • The Nation.
  • Mother Jones.
  • Vanity Fair.
  • Citizens For Legitimate Government.
  • News Finder.
  • Indy Media Center.
  • Lexis News.
  • Military Religious Freedom.
  • McClatchy Newspapers.
  • The New Yorker.
  • Bloggingheads TV, political vlogging.
  • Find, the next-best thing to Nexis.
  • Altweeklies, for the news you won't get just anywhere.
  • The Smirking Chimp
  • Don Emmerich's Peace Blog
  • Wikileaks.
  • The Peoples' Voice.
  • CIA World Fact Book.
  • IP address locator.
  • Tom Tomorrow's hilarious strip.
  • Babelfish, an instant, online translator. I love to translate Ann Coulter's site into German.
  • Newsmeat: Find out who's donating to whom.
  • Wikipedia.
  • Uncyclopedia.
  • Icasualties
  • Free Press
  • YouTube
  • The Bone Bridge.
  • Powered by Blogger