Friday, February 26, 2021

Worship the Fatted Golden Jackass

(By American Zen's Mike Flannigan, on loan from Ari .)
 "Fifteen men on the dead man's chest—
...Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum!
Drink and the devil had done for the rest—
...Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum!"
Usually, right wingers pretend the New Testament was never written. This time around, they're also pretending the Old Testament was never written, either.
    Otherwise, how else to explain why they'd wheeled, in full public view, a golden statue of Donald Trump, complete with red, white and blue board shorts and a full head of hair he doesn't own, at CPAC in Florida today? That would be the same CPAC that was hijacked decades ago by Matt Schlapp who, during the Age of Trump turned what was already an annual mini Nuremberg rally into the right wing version of the Che Guevara Show.
     It kicked off today with a screaming Ted Cruz, Cancun sand still between his toes, clutching his head and howling about the Biden administration and the media's plan to dominate the world with a 1000 year reign of terror (Like the 3rd Reich, get it, get it?). To show you how far Fredo has fallen on the GOP's organizational map, he's been reduced to being the warmup act for a Japanese con man who heads a cult that actually thinks he's a reincarnated alien from Venus who'd created all life on earth.
     All that remains to be seen is if Donald Trump, a guy who has more impeachments than presidential election victories, will hug his own hideous statue as he'd treated the American flag like a drunk Playboy bunny at CPAC two years ago. The smart money would say yes, he will turn that monstrosity into a DNA bank.
     So, it only follows that CPAC would've been moved from Washington DC and its stringent COVID restrictions to a state inexplicably tied to pirate culture. Because that's what the right wing essentially is, these days- A motley collection of pirates and wouldbe pirates without a ship on which to commit their countless acts of attempted mutiny.
     That's why they're clinging to the rotting political corpse of one Donald J. Trump, a guy who's being chased by more prosecutors than the Gotti, Gambino and Lucchese crime families combined. This is how pathetic the GOP is: They're still clinging to Trump because they have nothing and no one else that they think can prevail against a Biden-Harris ticket in 2024. They also need someone who can always be relied upon to tell them how to think.

"Don't blame me. I voted for Himmler!"
To paraphrase Brokeback Mountain, they just can't quit him.
     Fox "News" interrupted some attendees at random while they were busy making Trump figurines out of their belly lint to ask them if they wanted Trump to be the Nazi nominee in 2024. (As if to answer that question for them, Moscow Mitch already said he would "absolutely" support Trump if he was the GOP nominee just  a couple of weeks after saying of Trump's role in the January riots, "Trump is practically and morally responsible for provoking the events of the day.") A surprising number of them said no.
     One said, "I really like Ron DeSantis in '24. I think President Trump has a huge role in our party fundraising and helping candidates get elected. His America First policy is still a very strong sentiment." IOW, as long as he keeps bringing in the parishioners and the collection plates full, I'm happy with his involvement. Otherwise...
     Another said, "The way it stands right now, if I were to make my very own prediction, my hopes as a native Floridian is it's going to be our very own Ron DeSantis." That would be the ambulatory organ donor who's on pace to kill 100,000 Floridians with his nonchalant response to COVID-19. Yo ho ho and a bottle of Koolaid.
     But the main takeaway from this is that, while they still want his involvement, they don't want him getting too involved. And, of course, being hidebound right wing nut jobs, they'll bow their heads and bend over the barrel in the extremely unlikely event he gets the GOP nomination (considering he's not cooling his heels in a Super Max by then).
     And they honestly don't care that just seven weeks ago, he led an insurrection in the nation's capitol that claimed five lives including that of a cop. They don't care that he's being chased by an army of US attorneys, Attorneys General and DAs. They don't care that one of them now has his taxes in his hot little hands and will soon reveal to the world what Trump has been bitterly and viciously hiding for six years.
     They don't care that he's responsible for the needless deaths of over half a million Americans and that the ones that have died since January 20th are still on his tab and that he has his own neglect to blame for that. They don't care that Trump thinks they're "disgusting" and that he painted a target on the back of his own Vice President because he wouldn't violate the Constitution for him (which alone ought to give any wouldbe Republican second banana pause before accepting the dubious honor of being his running mate). They don't care that Trump has never felt that the unconditional loyalty he demands of others is reciprocal.
     They just want to be part of the transaction (and all of Donald Trump's relationships, for want of a better word, are transactional in nature as long as they're beneficial to him), one that doesn't have the slightest problem with murdered and mutilated cops, dead supporters killed doing his bidding and would love nothing more than to supplant our democratic republic with something that values only one life and where none of the laws matter any more.


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