Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Contra Temps


If you're out of work, then you're probably as sick and tired as me of being given the runaround, an attitude from kids too young to remember the New Kids on the Block who work at temp agencies or being lied to. Time again, I get called by temp agencies, agencies who, knowing how unpopular they are, lure unwary unemployed folks like me into wasting our time and energy by hiding their identity.

I just spoke to a Latina chickie with whom I'd had words last year when I was given the runaround back then. After she'd killed just about the last of my cell phone minutes by telling me how I'm not qualified to work in a QC lab with polymers (I've worked for years in QC and years more in other places making plastics but not at the same time), she abruptly ended the conversation because she remembered me having "dissed" her.

This is what I said: Temp agencies (euphemistically known nowadays as "staffing agencies") are a waste of time. The higher the unemployment rate, the snottier and pickier their clients get. The clients, up until a decade ago, had no choice but to take whomever the agency sent. Nowadays, without actually risking anything by being in the hiring process, they insist on insinuating themselves in the interview process and won't even talk to you unless you have 30-40 years of job experience, three sheepskins from Ivy League universities and, while it's not exactly a prerequisite, it would also help if you can tap dance on water.

They're essentially telling the temp agencies, "I don't trust your judgment and insist on bogging down what used to be a streamlined process without actually risking anything." In essence, they're making the temp agencies, who used to be the weeding out process, completely redundant and they'd save a pile of money by simply hiring these people directly instead of going through an agency they plainly don't trust. Why don't they just eliminate the middle man?

But just try telling this to airheads as the one at this last temp agency. They call it being "dissed" even though what I'm saying is true: The process is so cumbersome, so inefficient, it takes guys like me longer to make money, it takes the staffing agencies longer to make money because of this pickiness and the clients' orders go nowhere, hence their own customers suffer because the orders aren't getting done or invoiced. But explaining to them what's obvious to the rest of us is considered harassment.

I've never liked temp agencies even when the process was streamlined. They use you for a week or two then they jerk you out of a placement and, after promising to be in touch, you never hear from them again.

Now they're simply impossible to work with or work for. The emphasis is tilted toward their clients, the ones who deny them revenue, and not at all to we the workers, the ones who MAKE them the money. If you respond to an ad in good faith and someone from a staffing agency calls you up, tell them what I just told you and tell them Robert sent you just before you hang up on them. Shit's got to change and more and more companies are looking at training as a mere drain on their bottom line and they expect you to hit the ground running and fly-by-night outfits like the one with which I'd just spoken and other "staffing agencies" are merely fostering that self-destructive mindset. What's going to happen when the current experienced work force dies off, retires or moves on? Who'll take their place?

Now, perhaps, you'd be tempted to say, you'd be best served if you just shut your big, fucking pie hole, JP, and just take what was offered. And ordinarily, you'd be right. In normal times, you'd be able to catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. However, the flies in this case ain't buying no matter what you put out for them.

Being polite and patient has gotten me nowhere. Polite or strident, patient or impatient, I've been told time and again by one temp agency after another that I wasn't good enough or experienced enough or educated enough to hold down jobs I've held down and at which I made a good name for myself years ago. After going on ten unemployed months of unending rejection, you, too, would reach your limit and would start giving people a piece or two of your mind.

The problem is that with the unemployment rate officially at 9.7% (unofficially, it's closer to 17-20% nationwide), companies offering these 3 million scarce jobs are raising qualification standards to stratospheric levels and they feel they can afford to shrink their strike zone down to the size of a subatomic particle. I've worked in Class 10,000 clean rooms assembling medical devices. But not long enough. I've worked in QC for years. But not with the right product, despite basic ISO standards and protocols covering a wide array of manufacturing.

Last September 9th, I interviewed for a cashiering job even though I have retail management experience with two other C store chains and when I got the rejection letter from the 12 year-old who interviewed me, I was told that I was underqualified for the $10 ph clerk job for which I was vastly overqualified because they found somebody who was even more qualified than me. Despite my management experience going back to a day in which my interviewer wasn't even a hardon in her Daddy's pants (Her Dad owned the franchise, btw).

In other words, I was told I was simultaneously both overqualified and underqualified for the same low-paying, dead-end, shit job. I am literally in a situation in which I cannot win.

Meanwhile, after being given the runaround by one employer/temp agency after another for close to a year about how I'm not perfectly, exactly, precisely what they're looking for, that I'm not quite good enough or knowledgeable enough, I get in cabs where the drivers need a GPS to get me a mile and a half down the road, non-English-speaking morons get my order wrong at Dunkin Donuts or McDonalds and temp workers call me up to tell me I'm not good enough, after all, because they know their clients refuse to waste even five seconds of their precious time interviewing a guy with a long and solid work history.

Pissed off? Me?

The Quality Control job to which I'd alluded earlier was one that I'd earned through hard work on the floor at my next-to-last job. I was promoted from within after working TDY in the QC lab crunching numbers and doing wall thickness tests with Vernier calipers. The company, in fact, aggressively pursued me when a high ranking acquisitions engineer from Boeing, a great sports-loving, slap-happy mountain of a man named Bernie Everett, personally requested they promote me to get a crucial sixth set of eyes in the lab to handle the extra business Boeing was prepared to throw our way.

Others from off the street were interviewed but the HR Director told me in confidence that none of them had a chance regardless of their experience or skills. The job was always mine, due to my Boeing friend's initiatives.

Now, despite all that I learned working for an ISO 9000 company in the airline/aerospace/automotive/medical device industry, in spite of my qualification to work in many other forms of fabrication, suddenly I'm not even qualified for even an entry level QC position at two bucks an hour less than I made 8 years ago. I've applied for kennel jobs, dishwashing jobs, cashier jobs, jobs so far beneath me and my skill set that it almost physically hurts to remind myself at how far I've fallen.

And I get ignored almost every time, except when contacted by a temp agency who only called because they momentarily forgot who I was and where I'm coming from.

What's the answer? Hell, if I knew, folks, I'd probably be sitting in a corner office somewhere pulling down 6 figures a year as a consultant. But the answer will not come from Obama, the Democrats, certainly not Republicans who bark "Tax cuts" or "Drill, baby, drill!" when asked for their input on anything.

We live in dark times that only the very aged remember ever having seen, an age in which no one cares how long you've been out of work or how little you make on your dwindling unemployment or at much your self-respect has been eroded by going for jobs for which you're vastly overqualified and either being told you're still underqualified or being ignored. That's because there's no collective sense of responsibility because everyone is trapped in their own skin. You are the only common denominator, the only repository for constant, neverending failure and rejection. And they do not wish to hear your desperate pleas for a chance, let alone your criticism of how inefficient the process has become.

Economic experts are forecasting that the unemployment rate will hover at double digits for several years running, a fact that, to my way of thinking, qualifies as a depression. Jobs that we used to do and do well, jobs to which we were promoted from within and for which we were trained, are now suddenly unavailable or unattainable. The gulf between qualifications and what employers are prepared to pay you for them in return has gotten wider than the Grand Canyon.

And there's no end in sight.

Usually, I would end this blog post by making a pithy observation or proposing a possible commonsensical solution to a problem I've addressed.

But answers and words fail me now.

6 Comments:

At February 9, 2010 at 5:00 PM, Blogger vortexgods said...

This country is on the way out.

Therefore, there ought to be a "brain drain" to other countries that are not on their way out. That's the common sense solution, but even though I currently have a decent job I haven't been able to figure out the how of getting out ! (It doesn't help that my fiancée enjoys being chained to this corpse... )

My brother-in-law managed to put his field medic training to good use for a time as a medic for an Irish Rugby team. So it is possible to get out.

Seriously, there is still civilization in the world and you should be using your brains to advance it. The U.S.A. clearly doesn't appreciate them nor does it appreciate civilization. (By the U.S.A. I mean the government, which has made it impossible for us mere peasants to impact it.)

This idea doesn't even come from me originally. Chalmers Johnson, having a good understanding of the coming of Nemesis, said that this is the advice he'd give to a young American. "Buy a condo in Vancouver."

 
At February 9, 2010 at 6:47 PM, Blogger Bridget Magnus said...

Wow, your experience with temp firms is so different from mine!

Granted, this was well over a decade ago *and* the firm in question specialized in the area where I was seeking work. But they kept my in work the summers I was in grad school, and they set up "working interviews" for real positions while I was unemployed, *and* they had also done this service for my mom -- who was a manager and thus in a position to hire temps.

The ones I find totally dishonest are the "employment agencies" that want you to pay money up front to them before they will tell you anything about available positions. I clearly recall on at least 2 occasions saying "There seems to be a mistake. I am looking for a job because I *need* money."

 
At February 9, 2010 at 7:12 PM, Blogger Beau said...

Sorry for the giant sucking sound regarding work prospects JP. Vortex has a point however, have you ever looked into your chances of working in Canada? If you meet any of the professions at the link immigration is a breeze. You have to have a job first but unemployment isn't a problem in BC anyway.
http://immig-canada.blogspot.com/2009/02/list-of-occupations-required-for.html

One of my colleagues is recently transplanted from the US. He made the move before the current economic collapse and wanted to come for the experience. The cost and quality of living is by far above the US but with all of the same social mores as the US. Health care is cheap if you have to purchase it yourself but most employers include it in the compensation package. Just sayin'

 
At February 9, 2010 at 7:18 PM, Blogger Beau said...

BC medical service plan is $102.per month for a couple, $57. single. Living in a socialist country is great.

 
At February 9, 2010 at 9:08 PM, Blogger jurassicpork said...

$57 a month, huh? My last fucking job, that offered Fallon, w/o dental, was $63+.

Per week.

 
At February 10, 2010 at 7:33 AM, Blogger Puddin' Tator said...

Have you considered running for office? Here in Chicago last week the winner of the Democratic nomination for Lieutenant Governor was revealed, one day after the election, to be a steroid-abusing wife assaulter who also threatened his prostitute girlfriend ("She told me she was a massage
therapist") with a knife. He is also $60K behind in child support payment to his now ex-wife. Oh, his previous work experience? Pawn Broker.

See, you don't need any prior experience in the field, or even a clean arrest record. The pay is decent and easily supplemented with bribes-use both hands, you get more. You also get free health care and a sweet pension plan.

But you seem too decent and intelligent to run for office.

The Canada thing could work. They have a better national anthem, more hockey and the fishing is tremendous!!

 

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home

All Time Classics

  • Our Worse Half: The 25 Most Embarrassing States.
  • The Missing Security Tapes From the World Trade Center.
  • It's a Blunderful Life.
  • The Civil War II
  • Sweet Jesus, I Hate America
  • Top Ten Conservative Books
  • I Am Mr. Ed
  • Glenn Beck: Racist, Hate Monger, Comedian
  • The Ten Worst Music Videos of all Time
  • Assclowns of the Week

  • Links to the first 33 Assclowns of the Week.
  • Links to Assclowns of the Week 38-63.
  • #104: Make Racism Great Again Also Labor Day edition
  • #103: A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Toilet edition
  • #102: Orange is the New Fat edition
  • #101: Electoral College Dropouts edition
  • #100: Centennial of Silliness edition
  • #99: Dr. Strangehate edition
  • #98: Get Bentghazi edition
  • #97: SNAPping Your Fingers at the Poor edition
  • #96: Treat or Treat, Kiss My Ass edition
  • #95: Monumental Stupidity double-sized edition
  • #94: House of 'Tards edition
  • #93: You Da Bomb! edition.
  • #92: Akin to a Fool edition.
  • #91: Aurora Moronealis edition.
  • #90: Keep Your Gubmint Hands Off My High Pre'mums and Deductibles! edition.
  • #89: Occupy the Catbird Seat/Thanksgiving edition.
  • #88: Heil Hitler edition.
  • #87: Let Sleeping Elephants Lie edition.
  • #86: the Maniacs edition.
  • #85: The Top 50 Assclowns of 2010 edition.
  • #(19)84: Midterm Madness edition.
  • #83: Spill, Baby, Spill! edition.
  • #82: Leave Corporations Alone, They’re People! edition.
  • #81: Hatin' on Haiti edition.
  • #80: Don't Get Your Panties in a Twist edition.
  • #79: Top 50 Assclowns of 2009 edition.
  • #78: Nattering Nabobs of Negativism edition.
  • #77: ...And Justice For Once edition.
  • #76: Reading Tea Leaves/Labor Day edition.
  • #75: Diamond Jubilee/Inaugural Edition
  • #74: Dropping the Crystal Ball Edition
  • #73: The Twelve Assclowns of Christmas Edition
  • #72: Trick or Treat Election Day Edition
  • #71: Grand Theft Autocrats Edition
  • #70: Soulless Corporations and the Politicians Who Love Them Edition
  • Top 10 Things Donald Trump Said to President Obama
  • Paul Ryan's Top Ten Conditions on Running for the Speakership
  • Top 10 Reasons Why Mitt Romney Won't Run for President in 2016
  • Top 10 Results of the NYPD's Work Slowdown
  • Top 10 Secret Service Security Breaches
  • Top 10 LA Radio Shows That Are Rated Higher Than Rush Limbaugh's
  • Top 10 Reasons Operation American Spring Went Flat
  • Top Ten Facts of the MH370 Air Disaster
  • Top 10 Tips for GOP Congressmen Running Against Women
  • Top 10 Signs Walmart's Mistreating its Workers
  • Top 10 Diversions John McCain Found During Syria Hearing
  • Top 10 George Zimmerman Excuses for Speeding.
  • Top 10 Reasons Paula Deen Got Fired by the Food Network
  • Top Ten Ways Pope Francis is Deviating From Convention
  • Top 10 Reasons For the Pope's Resignation
  • Top 10 Emails Hacked From the Bush Family's Email Accounts
  • Top 10 Lies Told by Mitt Romney at the 2nd Debate.
  • Top 10 Examples of How Hard the Campaign Trail is on Ann D. Romney.
  • Top 10 Ways to Tell The Boston Red Sox Are Finished.
  • Top 10 Things Mitt May be Hiding in His Tax Returns.
  • Top 10 Events at the Romney Olympics.
  • Mitt Romney's Top 10 Wild & Crazy Moments.
  • Top Ten Reasons Why Dick Cheney Got a Heart Transplant.
  • Top 10 Facts About Tonight's New England/Denver Game.
  • My Top 10 Resolutions.
  • Top 10 Rejected Slogans of the Romney Campaign.
  • Top 10 Reasons Herman Cain Suspended His Campaign.
  • Top 10 Trending Topics on Twitter During #OWS Eviction.
  • Top 10 Herman Cain Pickup Lines.
  • Top 10 Changes Since Anthony Weiner Decided to Resign.
  • Top 10 Inaccuracies re bin Laden's Death.
  • Top 10 Ways to Prevent a TSA Patdown.
  • Top Ten Things Not to Say When You're Pulled Over.
  • Top 10 Reasons Why Donald Trump Bowed Out of the Presidential Race.
  • Top 10 Ways Evangelicals Will Prepare for the Rapture II.
  • Top 10 Revelations in Today's Parliament Inquiry into News Corp.
  • Top 10 Reasons Why There Was No Vote on the Debt Ceiling Last Night.
  • Top 10 Revelations in Dick Cheney's Upcoming Memoir.
  • Top Ten Ways Americans Will Observe the 10th Anniversary of 9/11.
  • Top Ten Advances in Women's Rights in Saudi Arabia.
  • Top Ten Inaccuracies in Bill O'Reilly's Book About Lincoln.
  • Top Ten Suggestions From the Cat Food Commission.
  • Top Ten Worst Moments in George W. Bush's Presidency.
  • Top Ten Facts in George W. Bush's Memoir.
  • Top Ten Reasons Terry Jones Postponed His Koran Burning
  • Top 10 Causes for Dick Cheney's Congestive Heart Failure
  • Top Ten Ways That Jan Brewer Will Celebrate Cinco de Mayo
  • Top Ten Demands in Sarah Palin's Contract
  • Top Ten Whoppers in Karl Rove's New Book
  • Top 10 Items Left Behind in Rush Limbaugh's Apartment
  • Top Ten Things Barack Obama said to Rush Limbaugh in the Hospital
  • Top Ten Bizarre Promos Offered by the New Jersey Nets
  • Top 10 Bush Executive Orders Labor Wants President Obama to Repeal
  • George W. Bush's Top Ten Lesser Achievements
  • Empire Of The Senseless.
  • Christwire.org: Conservative Values for an Unsaved World.
  • Esquire's Charles Pierce.
  • Brilliant @ Breakfast.
  • The Burning Platform.
  • The Rant.
  • Mock, Paper, Scissors.
  • James Petras.
  • Towle Road.
  • Avedon's Sideshow (the new site).
  • At Largely, Larisa Alexandrovna's place.
  • The Daily Howler.
  • The DCist.
  • Greg Palast.
  • Jon Swift. RIP, Al.
  • God is For Suckers.
  • The Rude Pundit.
  • Driftglass.
  • Newshounds.
  • William Grigg, a great find.
  • Brad Blog.
  • Down With Tyranny!, Howie Klein's blog.
  • Wayne's World. Party time! Excellent!
  • Busted Knuckles, aka Ornery Bastard.
  • Mills River Progressive.
  • Right Wing Watch.
  • Earthbond Misfit.
  • Anosognosia.
  • Echidne of the Snakes.
  • They Gave Us a Republic.
  • The Gawker.
  • Outtake Online, Emmy-winner Charlotte Robinson's site.
  • Skippy, the Bush Kangaroo
  • No More Mr. Nice Blog.
  • Head On Radio Network, Bob Kincaid.
  • Spocko's Brain.
  • Pandagon.
  • Slackivist.
  • WTF Is It Now?
  • No Blood For Hubris.
  • Lydia Cornell, a very smart and accomplished lady.
  • Roger Ailes (the good one.)
  • BlondeSense.
  • The Smirking Chimp.
  • Hammer of the Blogs.
  • Vast Left Wing Conspiracy.
  • Argville.
  • Existentialist Cowboy.
  • The Progressive.
  • The Nation.
  • Mother Jones.
  • Vanity Fair.
  • Salon.com.
  • Citizens For Legitimate Government.
  • News Finder.
  • Indy Media Center.
  • Lexis News.
  • Military Religious Freedom.
  • McClatchy Newspapers.
  • The New Yorker.
  • Bloggingheads TV, political vlogging.
  • Find Articles.com, the next-best thing to Nexis.
  • Altweeklies, for the news you won't get just anywhere.
  • The Smirking Chimp
  • Don Emmerich's Peace Blog
  • Wikileaks.
  • The Peoples' Voice.
  • Dictionary.com.
  • CIA World Fact Book.
  • IP address locator.
  • Tom Tomorrow's hilarious strip.
  • Babelfish, an instant, online translator. I love to translate Ann Coulter's site into German.
  • Newsmeat: Find out who's donating to whom.
  • Wikipedia.
  • Uncyclopedia.
  • anysoldier.com
  • Icasualties
  • Free Press
  • YouTube
  • The Bone Bridge.
  • Powered by Blogger