Monday, January 28, 2019

Gotham City Digest: Tilting at Non-Existent Walls edition

(In which we vow that "Incest is Best" will never be on our masthead.)

     "State Department cancels border security conference due to shutdown over border security." A few days old but still hilariously ironic.

     In case you got any silly ideas about Harris for President... (source LA Times.)

     “They save good people from attempting a very dangerous journey from other countries. Thousands of miles because they think they have a glimmer of hope of coming through. With a wall they don’t have that hope.” -Some sadistic fuck squatting in the Oval Office.

     By a happy twist of fate, Roger Stone just happened to draw the same judge that threw Manafort's ostrich-covered fat ass in prison. Watch the video where Stone got cat-called and heckled

     I thought they revered all life in India. I guess that was bullshit, too.

      We had no contact with Russia!
      OK, we had SOME contact with SOME Russians but not from the Russian government!
      Alright, SOME of them were connected to the Russian government but...
      Hillary's emails! Lock her up!

     Sure, because why NOT go whining to a guy who's been banned all over social media?

     The 12th paragraph of Mueller's indictment of Roger Stone is probably the most interesting because the "senior Trump Campaign official" referenced is surely either Trump himself, Don Jr or Jared Kushner. It could be interpreted as a warning that more indictments closer to Trump's circle will come.

     Typically, the Stone arrest and indictment and him caving to Pelosi on the government shutdown on the same day resulted in more unhinged bullshit on Twitter such as ,"We will build the wall!" Which he's been saying for going on four years now.

     Thanks to Trump, these poor Afghani families can't even bury their dead without getting killed themselves. We wiped out 29 members of an extended family with this one.

     A little crash course on the bullshit concept of austerity measures. It's all a con, people. And it started way before the bailout of 2008.

     Remember just two days ago Roger Stone was all, "I'll fight them on the beaches... yada yada yada"? Then I guess he saw all the prison memes on the internet and now is singing a different tune. Pretty soon, whenever Trump makes a public appearance they'll switch out "Hail to the Chief" for "The Party's Over", as in the Republican Party.
     So, in summation, Roger Stone is either setting up Donald Trump so Mueller can tee off on him or himself for perjury charges. Stay tuned for more.

     Meanwhile, Mick Mulvaney, the guy who drafted a budget with a two TRILLION dollar error, took a swan dive from 100 stories above solid concrete to deliver these whoppers.

     Another example of those famous rock-ribbed, conservative Republican family values!

     So, Russian bombers were buzzing our northern coastline. I guess Putin wanted a closer look at his new North American colony. Or maybe he wants Alaska back.

     Why pork rind-crunching goobers thought electing a billionaire to the White House was a good idea is anyone's guess.

     Yeah, let's talk about a fucking caravan, shall we?

      Gee, it wouldn't be because they have something to hide such as collusion with a hostile nation or money laundering involving the "president", Douche Bank and the Russians or sabotaging the results of the 2016 election that Hillary actually won, could it?

     So, Trump fired a bunch of undocumented immigrants during the border wall standoff. Boy, what a class act, huh?

     So, when Trump said he would "proudly" take credit for shutting down the government and wouldn't blame the Democrats, what he REALLY meant was he WOULD blame the Democrats? OK, it would've helped if you led with, "We were now living in Bizarro World." #promiseskept

     Just days before Trump was supposed to make a diplomatic visit to Peru, the Peruvian government approved 4 new Trump trademarks. Another Festivus miracle!

     Great story with a happy ending.

     I've just watched part one of Netflix's Conversations With a Killer: Ted Bundy. And I'm immediately struck by the countless similarities between Bundy and Trump, things that go well beyond the fact they were born in the same year. There's the utter lack of concern or feeling for other humans, the inability to take responsibility for their own actions, a refusal or incapacity to look at their own actions except through the prism of a third person, the right wing politics and loathing for the liberal agenda. And after having watched this first episode, I fear more than ever of what we put in the White House.

     Tom Brokaw always struck me as some elitist douchebag who sounds like Thurston Howell III with his jaw wired shut. But I never knew he was such a clueless, racist asshole until yesterday.

     I can't believe this medieval Inquisition shit is going on in my state.

     Trump's poll numbers are tanking after his cave-in, so naturally, he's claiming they're going up even among Hispanics.

     If it wasn't for him still rah rahing Trump on The View today, I'd be half-tempted to buy Cliff Sims' book considering all the nuggets that are in it, including this one about Stephen Miller.

     So of course, Harris County Texas Republicans use Holocaust Remembrance Day to bash liberals for it. Even though it was ultra right wing Nazis, the Republican Party's spiritual forebears, who were to blame for it.

     Modern-day Fagin wants get rid of all child labor laws.

     Trump shut down the government for over a month over $5.7 billion. We lost $6 billion, as a result.

     At last, a nugget of honesty from this shitshow of an administration. And finally...

     A little blast from the past lest you think Wilbur Ross is the rare Trump administration official who's free from scandal. He was accused of stealing $120,000,000 he plainly didn't need as well as owning an interest in a Russian shipping company owned by Vladimir Putin's son in law.
     At this point, we should be asking ourselves if anyone in Trump's Cabinet has any ties to the US.


At January 28, 2019 at 8:23 PM, Anonymous CC said...

And the Democratic People's Republic of Korea is democratic.

Today's Republican Party wants to shove the inconvenient memory of the Nazis on the left even as it resembles the Nazis in some ways with its behavior.

That it can openly do this is due in no small part to Trump, but also to an abundance of ignorant supporters--some of whom fly Nazi and Confederate flags at their rallies.

I wonder what Republicans like Eisenhower, who actually fought the Nazis, would say about this.

At January 28, 2019 at 8:56 PM, Blogger jurassicpork said...

Oh, he'd change parties, rack the slide back and let the bullets fly.


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