Taco Truck Trump

     On October 14, 1912, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, a tavern owner named John Schrank shot former President Teddy Roosevelt. The kinetic force of the bullet was greatly blunted by Roosevelt's steel eyeglass case and the copy of the 50 page speech he was about to deliver. Even after that, Roosevelt refused medical care and remained standing in the car he was in and delivered the entire speech, anyway.

     Roosevelt came from a completely different generation, one in which, as the saying goes, "men were men and the women were damned glad for it." So perhaps it's a little unfair to compare the 26th president to the wet-legged cowards we see in our government today. Still, the contrast between the generations is jarring.

      The NY Times recently reported that Trump and the Secret Service engaged in some subterfuge in Ankara, Turkey last July 8th. The government had received a "credible threat" that Iran was planning on firing a missile at the old Air Force One. Since none of us received that threat assessment, we have no choice but to take it at face value.

     As we all know, protecting the president is the Secret Service's top priority. Using decoys is not exactly uncommon in that agency. My Social Studies teacher, Mr. Lemkin, once informed us that Nixon was so hated that when he took off on Marine One, the Secret Service sent out several helicopters so that potential bad actors never knew which one Nixon was on.

     So, in that respect, the NY Times article was something like a nothing burger.

     What is notable, however was the manner in which the Ankara subterfuge took place. Here's how it went down:

     Trump actually boarded Air Force One in full view of the press as the presidential press corps was still standing on the tarmac. On the other side of Air Force One was a little-noticed catering truck in which the box containing food supplies was lifted. What no one knew at the times, including the occupants of Air Force One and even the press was that Trump was in that box as it was lowered to the ground.

     Trump was then ferried to another jet, a smaller C-32A, while he left his top officials on the plane that was allegedly targeted by the Iranians. That included Secretary of State Marco Rubio, Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent, Stephen Miller and his Communications Director Steven Cheung. It also included the press corps that follow the president wherever he goes.

     Here's who he'd taken: Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, body man Walt Nauta, his former caddy Dan Scavino and Natalie Harp, aka the human printer.

     The press was then ordered by the Secret Service to lower their window shades during the transfer. 

     Trump then flew to England on the C-32A then returned to Joint Base Andrews on the original Air Force One as if he'd been on it the whole time. It could have been choreographed by David Copperfield.

     The strange choice in flying companions notwithstanding, the first question that should enter our minds is why were the nation's two top nuclear policy-makers on the same plane not once but twice on the same day? A day, again, in which Air Force One had been credibly threatened?

     The optics are horrible, to say the least. Trump had abandoned two Cabinet Secretaries plus the traveling press pool knowing Air Force One was targeted by a nation with whom we're (needlessly) at war. Furthermore, he escaped on a catering truck as if he was an aluminum half pan. One can easily imagine Trump screaming, "Save me, you assholes, save me!" as his eyes wildly darted all over the food box.

     It brings to mind Trump seeking refuge in the White House bunker as peaceful George Floyd protesters gathered in Washington in the summer of 2020. But, while he saw to his own safety, Trump abandoned to the Iranians' mercies some of his most trusted officials and advisors. They were called "sacrificial lambs" by the Times, a not unfair assessment. 

    Compare that to Teddy Roosevelt calling for mercy for John Schrank, who otherwise almost surely would've been lynched (His predecessor, President William McKinley, also called for mercy for his assassin, saying, "Take it easy on him, boys."). Trump abandoned his top aides and the press pool, sneaking off Air Force One like a thief in the night.

     It's part and parcel to Trump's cowardice and lifelong sociopathy.