Dum Dum From Queens

 

     JoJoFromJerz. We've all heard the handle, read her feed on Twitter, at least those of us liberals who put a clothespin on our noses and chose to endure the stench of pork rinds and Zyklon B since Musk took over. JoJo, whose real name is Joanne Carducci, in the nine years she's been on Twitter (Yes, I'm dead-naming it. Shut the fuck up and move on, snowflake), has amassed a following of well over a million. That's quite an accomplishment considering so many so-called progressives and liberals fled the sinking ship of Twitter for the even smaller sinking ship of Bluesky starting Election Day 2024. Give yourself a hand, you wet-legged cunts. Myspace awaits.

      Anyway, JoJo is a working single mother living in the suburbs of New Jersey. She's barely clinging onto her home. She may be well-known but political notoriety isn't the same as wealth or even solvency. Hell, I'm living proof of that. Well, late last month Joanne revealed that starting last year, she'd begun getting threatening letters from Melania Trump's lawyers. The Ultimate Stepford Wife apparently had a problem with JoJo calling her, someone who recently walked out with a robot, "robotic".

     They'd demanded she take down her posts criticizing the Trumps, publicly apologize and even tried to extort a one million dollar bribe get them to back off from their legal threats. Carducci obviously can't afford one million dollars. So she ignored the letters and continued posting her content online. The letters kept coming every month. JoJo kept her mouth shut.

     The implications were clear. If America's most infamous gold-digger had her way, Joanne could've been thrown out on the street along with her kids. However, despite her public silence, JoJo behind the scenes had consulted with attorneys as well as current and former elected officials, including Matt Platkin, the former AG of NJ.

     Platkin advised her without charge regarding her legal options. One unnamed "prominent" attorney agreed to take on her case pro bono until he made some phone calls and realized to his horror that, Oh my God, the Trumps have "inexhaustible resources". He then advised Carducci to capitulate to their every demand. Real Profile in Courage, whoever that shyster was.

     Then, suddenly, the letters stopped cold. 

 

     They stopped right after Melania walked out and expressed outrage that anyone would tie her to Jeffrey Epstein, despite having her picture taken with him and his jailbird girlfriend countless times over the years. In other words, like her TACO husband, Melania folded like a gut-punched 10 dollar hooker.

     Which she is.

     This wasn't the first time Melania's shysters sent demand and cease and desist letters to critics over the years. They sued Michael Wolff for a billion dollars, who then did the unexpected and counter-sued Melania (the suit was tossed by a judge). They sued Hunter Biden for another billion, then sued The Daily Beast, James Carville and HarperCollins UK (Harper Collins, being the right wing queefs that they've always been, immediately bent the knee without even first testing the legal waters).

     Like all bullies, the Trumps tend to fold when people like Carducci, Hunter Biden and Michael Wolff stand up to them and threaten to punch hem in the nose or at least refuse to capitulate. But Carducci's case was disturbingly different. Unlike Biden, the son of a former president, the Daily Beast and Harper Collins UK, which have lawyers on staff, Carducci is a private citizen of limited means. The months-long effort to chill her free speech is despicable.

     And threatening Carducci with legal action inevitably would've involved a slippery slope. Because the Trumps and their lawyers would've had to prove malice, that Carducci willfully spread falsehoods about the Trumps. That could've involved some embarrassing discovery. And there's also the First Amendment issue. But Melania isn't a government official. The Constitution only protects citizens from government overreach. This is why Trump himself directly wasn't involved in the legal threats. It wasn't because he was afraid of the perception of him punching down- he does that every day. But as a government official, he couldn't suppress a citizen's right to free speech.

     So basically, he used his own wife and her team of shysters to do what he himself wanted to do- Chill Joanne Carducci's right to free speech.

    Because they're scared of her and her reach.

    Well, Joanne, if you're by any chance reading this, we've got your back. And by "we", I don't mean the fair weather liberals who were chased off Twitter after Election Night because they couldn't hack the sound of redneck German.