Oh, Death, Where is Thy Sting?
George Zimmerman is the Teflon Terrorist, the Jenny Craig version of Ronald Reagan, a man with a soft, blubbery face like second generation dictators such as Baby Doc Duvalier and Kim Jong Un. It's preordained that before he's 32, George Zimmerman will be found dead in the back room of a Cancún bodega that doubles as a gay porn movie set, his bloated corpse on discovery by the laughing Mexican authorities being stripped, deformed penises drawn on him with eyeliner and picked over by barely-illegal gay porn actors. Between now and then, his jiggling puss and that of his soon-to-be ex wife Shellie will be plastered all over tabloid front pages vying for space with Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus and Bill and Monica.
I strenuously tried to ignore this social and psychological abortion, save for a Top Ten list, when he got pulled over in Texas for speeding, with a gun in his car and thought I was over him when I failed to mention even on Twitter him getting pulled over in Florida for, again, speeding.
Oh, yeah, and he also murdered an unarmed African American youth for dressing appropriately on a rainy night.
But just a few hours ago, George Zimmerman was picked up by Lake Mary police after he'd allegedly punched his father-in-law in the face and brandished a gun at both him and his estranged wife, who then had a change of heart and decided, just after making a terrified and terrifying 911 call, not to press charges, meaning George Zimmerman is once again at large and on the loose.
Zimmerman was in the company of his bodyguard that he supposedly keeps with him at all times, a bodyguard that was nonetheless conspicuously absent at the times Zimmerman was unsuccessfully re-enacting Natural Born Killers in the great states of Texas and Florida. He was said by his wife to be daring her to come closer, no doubt so he could invoke Stand Your Ground, his useless bodyguard, obviously, present for the purposes of intimidation .
Ergo, despite being basically a distended asshole wrapped around a gun, assaulting her father who nearly had a heart attack over the incident, threatened both their lives, destroyed her cell phone with a knife, Shellie Zimmerman still thinks they can work things out, a sense of optimism that has gotten countless women killed when put in similar circumstances.
It's bad enough that after this incident, we're doomed to see these two buffoons put on the cover of every edition of every tabloid like they're a cross between Rob and Amber and Bonnie and Clyde. It's bad enough that we have to hear time and again this slimy asshole once again got released by law enforcement under circumstances that a black man would likely never survive. It's bad enough when we hear about Ohio gun groups holding fund-raising drives that raised 12 grand to put a loaded weapon back in this man's hands.
But the worst part about this is this man is getting so much attention in the media as tabloid and Twitter fun fodder when the real bad guys are the signature-forging assholes at ALEC and nearly two dozen state legislatures for putting Stand Your Ground laws on the books not for the augmentation of personal liberty but for that of gun and ammo sales.
Trayvon Martin ought to be remembered because he was the innocent victim of ALEC, the Florida legislature, Stand Your Ground and, ultimately, George Zimmerman. The former was the victim of a racially-motivated execution. The latter wouldn't even be newsworthy were it not for the cold-blooded murder he'd carried out with relative impunity. Were it not for his Bircher-celebrated execution of a defenseless, innocent child barely a month beyond his 17th birthday, Zimmerman would be a quickly forgotten footnote in several smalltown police blotters.
George Zimmerman is the noxious stinkweed arising from the fetid ground of Stand Your Ground because we live in a nation in which certain factions have a problem with low-income and middle class people getting affordable health care yet none whatsoever with supporting corporately-driven model legislation that puts gun and ammunition sales at a much higher premium than the lives of innocents.
So let's stop talking about George Zimmerman and let's relegate him to the obscurity he so richly deserves until the news comes out of that gay porno movie set in Cancún.