Who Are You Gonna Believe? Me or My Lying Tongue?

 

     For those of you who don't have the time or inclination, one of the many reputable tools available to us political bloggers is Ballotpedia. It's essentially the wikipedia of electoral results going back several election cycles but it's more than that. Part of the database that comprises the site are candidate surveys that Ballotpedia sends out to anyone running for the House or Senate. 

     In a rare moment of idleness today, I decided to look up the election results for NY-3 because I originally wanted to see Santos' margin of victory. It wasn't even close, as he won by 8.4 percentage points, or by nearly 22,000 votes, over Robert Zimmerman. But, as is typical with George Santos, to whom truth is Kryptonite, those facts relating to him were the only ones because as much as he'd love to, Santos can't alter what's on Ballotpedia like he can his own palimpsestic campaign website. That especially goes for the survey that he was asked to take.

     The sleaziness lurches right out of the gate when Ballotpedia asked him, "Please list below 3 key messages of your campaign. What are the main points you want voters to remember about your goals for your time in office?"

     His third paragraph reads in part, "My parents came to America in search of making a better life for me and my family. I worked extremely hard to make the American dream a reality. I want to ensure that this is also a reality for our kids and grandkids."

     As far as dear old Mom goes, that was certainly true. Immigration records show she arrived in 2006 and worked as a health aide as she had in Brazil. George's own entry into the US is more, opaque, shall we say, and he beat Mom to the US. We know the reason for that: Santos stole a checkbook from one of his mother's dying patients and wrote a series of bad checks to buy himself expensive clothes and shoes.  So, yeah, I guess that qualifies as hard work to the American Dream a reality for him. When the Brazilian authorities began closing in, he fled to America to evade prosecution, kind of like Trump's grandfather fled Germany when he avoided the draft.

     All things considered, I don't know what rationale Santos used to obtain a visa or even if he got one but fleeing the long arm of the law, to me, isn't a valid reason to hand one out. Maybe we should take a closer look at Santos' immigration status to determine if he's even legally here.

     They went on to ask him, "What areas of public policy are you personally passionate about?"

     Santos' answer shows that Republicans have no sense of irony, shame or any other quality that makes up normal human psychology. The first sentence of his answer was, "One of the things I'm most passionate about is integrity and honesty in our government, especially financial policies."

     "Integrity and honesty in our government."

     "Especially financial policies."

     This is a guy who makes Donald Trump, a vaguely human-shaped black hole of falsehood, look like Abe Lincoln by conspicuous relief. This is a guy who'd just submitted an "amended" filing to the FEC, telling them that half a million of the $705,000 he loaned his campaign from his personal funds weren't really from his personal funds.

     So it's hard to see how bringing "integrity and honesty in our government, especially financial policies" starts with lying to the FEC about your personal finances and refusing to divulge where a half a million dollars of your money actually came from.

     Let's move on:

     "What do you believe are the core responsibilities for someone elected to this office?"

     "The number one responsibility of a United States Congressman is to represent their district. A Congressman has to be able to block out everything else going on around them in order to focus on best representing the district to which he or she is elected."

     I guess that includes blocking out questions from CNN's Manu Raju when he follows him through Congress and asks him to explain his latest lies and scandals. That obviously includes calling CNN "fake news" and accusing them of "lying to the American people".

     Then there's this:

     "What is the first historical event that happened in your lifetime that you remember? How old were you at the time?"

     "The first major historical event I have a deep comprehension of was September 11, 2001. This day is very personal for me as my mother was in the South Tower. She managed to escape the collapsing building and came to get me from school. My mother has since passed away, but September 11, 2001 is a day I will never forget."

     Oh my. And this just missed my birthday.

     Neither Santos nor his mother were anywhere near North America on 9/11, so she certainly didn't get him out of school, whether it was Horace Mann or anywhere else he claimed to attend.

     Perhaps intuitively understanding what NY-3 would be getting, they then asked him this loaded question: "If you could be any fictional character, who would you want to be?"

     "If I could be any fictional character, I would be Captain America."

     Because, lying? He could do that all day. In fact, he does. The ironic thing is, the fictional character he's already playing is called George Santos/Anthony Devolder, Wall Street tycoon, philanthropist. dog and cat rescuer and honorary Jew.

     "If you are not a current representative, are there certain committees that you would want to be a part of?"

     "When elected, I want to be part of the financial services committee. Because of my experience in the finance world, this is where I would be able to best serve my constituents and the country. I believe it is crucial that we bring new ideas and integrity to our government in order to help our country continue to grow and thrive."

     Oh, c'mon, get that look off your face. You knew he was going to say something like that.

     Because who needs experience working at banking giants like Goldman Sachs, Citigroup or any other when you can just spitball it? Fake it 'till you make it, baby!

     "Do you believe that two years is the right term length for representatives?"

     "If the terms were longer, Congressmen could say one thing just to get elected but completely abandon their constituents when elected and there wouldn't be anything they could do."

     Yes, you know he actually typed that with a straight face.

     Last question: "What are your thoughts on term limits?"

     "I have signed the term limits pledge, stating that I will only serve 3 terms of 2 years in United States Congress. "

     Uh huh. I seem to recall Santos saying he was going to serve just one term. Or am I imagining things? No. No, I'm not. 

     Maybe Santos' campaign song should've been, "Looking Through a Glass Onion" by the Beatles. Because whatever actually lies at Santos' core, considering he has one, must be so horrible and devoid of depth and substance that all the countless lies he piles on top must be preferable to what actually lies there.