Friday, July 24, 2020

Gotham City Digest

(We guarantee our bullshit's not scraped off the bottom of the barrel.)

    "A recursive theme of this presidency.*"

    Exactly 24 hours later, Maddow had another Trump scandal to expose, not the British Open but sort of.

    "Professional Kidnappers" tee shirt. Very nice, guys. How professional. They'll look great while you're standing on the unemployment line.

    So, the other day, Jazzy Jeff fucking Bezos made $13,000,000,000. In one day. During a pandemic. While many hundreds of millions are suffering economically. On what planet is this economically sustainable or morally ethical?

    When douchebags collide.

    Wow. This is coming from Esper.

    Your Karen o' the day.

    You may have heard about the slowly growing wave of "honest obituaries" that have been written by the surviving family of COVID-19 victims. This is just one of them.

   Your Brad o' the day. Don't fall for the belief that Massachusetts is one of the most liberal and racially harmonious states just because it's in the northeast. We're one of the most racist states in the northeast corridor, especially in the North and South ends of Boston and especially Roslindale.

    Yeah, I could see Trump doing this. We say Trump's crazy yet he has a diabolical and infallible  genius for protecting and enriching himself.

    The right wing asshole that shot and killed Judge Salas' son may have murdered a rival a week earlier.

     No one in Scandinavia wants to touch Pompous Maximus and for good reason.

     Your co-Karen o' the day.

     Trump even once admitted in the 90's that if he was ever elected president, he'd make a killing off it.

     If you Bidenbots have any lingering doubts that your boy is senile and out-of-touch, this latest statement should put that to rest. Many presidents owned slaves, Andrew Jackson carried out a genocide of Native Americans & Woodrow Wilson loved BIRTH OF A NATION so much he blurbed it and re-segregated the federal gov't.
     But Trump's the "first racist president" for saying "the Chinese virus."

    He's going to protect the American people, huh? He can't even protect the WH cafeteria from coronavirus.

   Sure, why not invade Chicago because after the smashing success Portland was, how could violence NOT go down?

     Person. Man. Woman. Allegations. Denial. TV.

     Meme intermission.

    Hun, you owe the world a debt that a simple two minute video can't repay. "Grab 'em by the pussy", "He was only a hero because he was captured, OK?", "They're sending their rapists and criminals over here," "I could shoot someone in the middle of 5th Avenue and not lose a single vote," and other great hits from the campaign trail.
    You voted for that monster, anyway. He made it obvious. And you voted for him, anyway, because, ew, icky Democrat. Go fuck yourself and your apology. You can't possibly take back your vote. You own this and you always will.

    Meanwhile, elsewhere in Apostate America, Joe Nocera admits he got it wrong about DeSantis while tens of millions of Americans got it right months ago. “I also believed that full-scale lockdowns cause more harm than good. I admired his willingness to buck the conventional wisdom. As a result, I was willing to overlook other things he was doing — or not doing."
    And THAT, my friend, is why and how Trump got "elected" "president." Fuck you and go eat crow in a dark corner.

    Christ, now the fucking Canadians are doing it.

    He's testifying before Congress, he's in prison, he's out again, he's in a French restaurant, he's in again, he's out again, he's everywhere! Michael Cohen is the Scarlet Prisoner, coming this fall on Fox.

    House Minority leader Charlie McCarthy: “There are more women running in the Republican Party for Congress than at any time in the history of this country. Take Mike Garcia, for instance..."

    So Wednesday, a federal judge ordered the release of the testimony of Epstein victim Virginia Guiffre against Allen Douchewitz. Judge Loretta Preska, incidentally, is a Bush appointee.

     Another co-Karen o' the day.

     The Lincoln Project's devastating new ad.

     Trump's day yesterday:
     1) Jacksonville Nazi rally called off.
     2) Mariano Rivera says it's safe to send Jr to school.
     3) Dr. Fauci's on an MLB mound.
     4) Epstein victim testimony against Dershowitz unsealed by judge.
     5) New corruption scandal (NOT the British Open).


     Your Brad o' the day, Darwin Award edition.

    The mayor of Portland, Ted Wheeler, got tear-gassed Wednesday night. Despite this, he STILL won't commit to more than merely "consider" banning tear gas, which he still allows his own police department to use.

    Lawyers For Trump isn't what you may think it is, although he WILL need about 100 defense lawyers when he's finally thrown out of office. It's a right wing group spearheaded by Texas AG Ken Paxton, who was indicted five years ago in a felony securities fraud trial.

     "President" Trump was being investigated by the FBI that had briefed him back when he was still Candidate Trump.

     I watched this six times in a row and I still don't know whether to laugh at her Wile E. Coyote antics or applaud her ballsiness. And finally...

     I can just hear right wing media now sneering at how the 79 year-old scientist flattened his curve and threw his pitch high and away.

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