First Day of (the) Fall

     While Greta Thunberg, the 16 year-old Aspie who's rapidly changing the world whether or not the grownups like it, delivered a fire and brimstone speech at the Youth Climate Summit at the United Nations, the Muslim-hating Donnie Dumbo was holding his own little summit on Christian Religious Persecution.
      But some time between Trump's shambling departure from the White House and that little sop thrown to gullible evangelicals and the professional climate change deniers, Trump managed to snatch defeat out of the jaws of victory and essentially admitted so much about the call to Zelensky that we basically no longer need the whistleblower report or the transcript of the phone call. This is what IQ 45 said as he arrived at the UN today:

"As far as withholding funds, those funds were paid. They were fully paid. But my complaint has always been, and I'd withhold again and I'll continue to withhold until such time as Europe and other nations contribute to Ukraine because they're not doing it."

     Earlier, he also admitted that he'd mentioned Biden. Eight times, to be more precise.
     By this afternoon, Speaker Nancy Pelosi formally announced the beginning of impeachment inquiries. Yes, the one who's infamous for saying from one Republican crime spree to another that "impeachment is off the table" is finally listening to her caucus and Donnie Dumbo himself, who seems to be daring the Democrats to impeach him.
     Meanwhile in the upper chamber, Minority Leader Chuck Schumer demanded through unanimous consent that DNI Jeff Maguire turn over the whistleblower complaint to the pertinent intelligence committees IMMEDIATELY. That's every Democrat and every Republican.
     So when Donnie Dumbo found out what Pelosi had just announced, this is what he had to say on (of course) Twitter:

      You're going down, fat man. Hard. Now do like any good mobster does and go to the mattresses. It'll help cushion the impact with the cold killing floor of the United States Congress.