Recently, Yahoo! News published a feature on what not to do
if you ever get pulled over by a police officer. Conspicuously missing from the feature were what not to say in that situation. What are the top ten worst things to say to a police officer after getting pulled over?10) "You must be new in town or fresh out of the academy. OK, you go straight, hang a right at the next set of lights and Dunkin' Donuts is right there on your left."9) "No, I'm not a lawyer but I slept in a Holiday Inn last night with your wife."8) "You know, if it wasn't for the two headless bodies in the trunk, I could've outrun you."7) "I'd pay your salary with my taxes if I didn't cheat on them every year!"6) "I don't know where the registration is, Officer. Pop the trunk and ask the owner."5) "Riddle me this: What drives a motorcycle, is dressed in blue and too stupid to pass the detective's exam?"4) "My other car's the Batmobile and you're about to blow my secret identity, flatfoot!"3) "Sucks for me that Wal-Mart or the mall's not hiring security guards."2) "I've been waiting for this opportunity. For months, I've been practicing reciting the alphabet backwards while dead drunk."1) "What are you packing, a 9 millimeter? I'm sorry about your small penis."