Thursday, March 1, 2018

Breaking News

     ...and Welcome Back to Gotham City ensures it stays broken.

     Looks as if Ben Carson might be having a yard sale of barely-used furniture. By now, you may have heard that our hoity toity HUD Secretary ordered over $31,500 of custom dining furniture as part of his office's renovation. Anything over $5000 for an official's office renovation requires Congressional approval. Carson claims to be completely surprised by this order to renovate his own office even though his wife Candy (Yes, her actual name is Candy) strong-armed an aide to find a way to circumvent the $5,000 spending limit. This apparently, was so excessive that Trey Gowdy, who recently announced he's not seeking re-election, found his inner fiscal hawk and sent Carson's soon-to-be renovated office a three page letter explaining the order. Trump's also pretty furious about it. You know, the guy who bankrupted the Secret Service within six months.

     Last week, you may heard about the son of Sun Myung Moon planning on holding a blessing ceremony for parishioners' AR-15s. Well, the stupid bastards went ahead and did it, and they terrorized the local community so much, the nearby school canceled classes for that day.
     Here's an actual shot of them during their blessing ceremony. I don't know, maybe it's me but does this remind anyone of something else that looks familiar?
     Yeah, that's it.
     Hey, at least these Moonies aren't religious fundamentalist extremists like those other guys, huh?

     Cue "Another One Bites the Dust". Today, Hope Hicks, who'd just testified that she'd told "little white lies" for Donald Trump before the House Intelligence Committee, became the 33rd administration official to leave or get fired in the 13 months of this reality shit show we're forced to call an administration. To put that into better perspective, that''s an average of nearly three departures a month and Hicks is the third Communications Director to leave or get fired, making that post the Star Trek red shirt of the US government. Apparently, Trump's former squeeze and wife beater Rob Porter's former squeeze and woman-abusing Corey Lewandowski'a former squeeze, was berated by Trump right after her testimony, calling her "stupid." Even for a woman who continually gets romantically involved with misogynists, this was too much for her.
     Yes, Trump called her stupid, the same stable genius who said we need to do something about women giving birth in their ninth month.

     By now, you no doubt have heard about Jared Kushner's security clearance downgrade. There are three major reasons for this: Russia, Russia and Russia. It also had something to do with four different nations (surprisingly, neither of the ones listed by the WaPo included Russia) that spoke about how to exploit Kushner partly because of his financial troubles and using that for leverage (Kind of like something out of a mob movie: "Do dis fer me an' th' slate'll be rubbed clean, capish?"). Another reason is Kushner lying on his SF86 form and the two subsequent revisions to it that gave him two more opportunities to come clean about over 100 contacts with Russian officials, including the now infamous June 2016 Trump Tower meeting between Don Jr, Kushner and Manafort with a Kremlin-linked lawyer and spy and a former KGB agent. And the biggest reason why Kushner had his clearance downgraded was because of the Mueller probe, which has Trump's son in law squarely in its cross hairs. Amazingly, despite lying about over 100 Russian contacts, some with very high-ranking officials and spies, this man still has a job at the White House.

     Gee, trickle down economics doesn't work... again! Who could've predicted that?

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