Twenty Bucks, Same as in Town: Thumpin' edition

As Mikey Flannigan recently said, Citizen's United can giveth as well as taketh. In this case, the Super PACs that were supposed to hand the elections to the Republicans as per the Supreme Court's wishes wound up handing most of them to the Democrats, instead. So lets take a stroll through Blogtopia and see what my comrades in arms are saying about last night's buttfucking of the GOP, shall we?

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Jill at Brilliant at Breakfast gives us a comprehensive rundown, giving generous props to the Big Dog, the Big Storm and her Big Governor in Bill, Chris and Sandy. Personally, I'm much happier over Romney losing than Obama winning and you libs who'd voted for him again will have to live with that. But for now, I'm happy with the way the election turned out overall and Jill is, too.

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D r i f t g l a s s has a message for Karl "Math Man" Rove and it doesn't bode well. Seems that everyone Sheldon Adelson backed from Rmoney on down lost big time last night, including a certain psycho jarhead named Allen West. If there's a God or patron saint for liberal bloggers, maybe Shelly will make Rove rolf his pasty, bloated carcass at gunpoint until the next election.

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The Rude One has some Dutch Uncle words of advice for Republicans who got what they had coming to them in A Few Brief Notes to Republicans on the Day After Their Defeat by Barack Obama. Like me, the Rude One doesn't think they'll listen but these obvious things had to be said.

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The General and Politico, which has garnered enormous credibility with the paste-eaters of the blogosphere this election cycle, are no doubt disappointed by the president's razor thin mandate that only includes, "Hispanics, African-Americans, single women and highly educated urban whites." I guess they don't count because that doesn't include the dwindling number of conservative, lunchpail-carrying white males who work at construction sites and spit on hippies not to mention Wall Street tycoons like Donald "I Look Like a Baked Orange" Trump. Throw in the president's obvious support among gays, lesbians, bisexuals, the 18-24 demographic, Jews and other reliable Democratic voters, that makes for a very thin mandate, indeed.

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John Herrman at Buzzfeed found a list of 17 wingnuts who openly called for Obama's assassination on Twitter last night. And I'm sure that list is far from exhaustive. So the next time some right wing twat tweaks you for not being civil enough to them or their psychopath of choice, show them this article.

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Tengrain at Mock, Paper, Scissors has a shameless rundown of last night's debacle and he doesn't apologize for it. Nor should he. Here's a sample, in which Tengrain briefly channels D r i f t g l a s s and tells it simply but poetically: "What we are seeing is a dinosaur party thrashing about in the tar pits not realizing that their fate is already sealed." Amen and pass the evolution.

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Matt Taibbi comes too dangerously close to my liking for this inevitable, "Both sides do it" argument that we heard from fucking Jon Stewart two years ago. Yet, he makes some good points in a post he wrote for Rolling Stone yesterday at the start of the elections. But, no, Mattie, both sides do not do the same thing. While the racist, hind leg-chewing bedsheet wearers that made up virtually all of Romney's base were accusing the president of being the anti-Christ, a Commie, a Socialist, a Muslim, an atheist and everything else that Rush and Drudge could stuff into their echo chamber heads, we were just insisting that Romney fessed up about his taxes. Passions get aroused during election years. Deal with it or get the fuck out of the game.

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Roger Ailes (the good one) has a brief but hilarious post straight from Glenn Beck's sweat-drenched conspiracy theory website, citing a very reliable source of my old Twitter foil Brad "I Am the Ted Nugent of Hack Novelists" Thor who relayed the horrible news that (Oh, nos!) Obama's campaign was confident they'd win and had the nerve, gall, audacity and effrontery to tell them there darkies to get out and vote. Which is certainly less forgivable than Romney showing up in Boston with just a victory speech and had to wing his concession speech, even obscenely charging the press for access to his deflated victory bash for the 1%.

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Fearguth at Bildungblog reliably gives us some hilarious captions about last night's elections.