Thursday, December 29, 2016

The Future's So Breitbart, He's Gotta Wear Shades

     I don't know what it is with the publishing business.
     Ever since a generation ago, when they began refusing to do their jobs and relying on literary agencies to go through the "slush pile", as they derisively refer to half-forgotten authors' work, they've troweled out one turkey after another (largely due to their rigid insistence on buying at least 80% of their properties from said brain-dead literary agents who fail to place 90-95% of the adult properties they rep). The publishing poobahs also seem especially ingratiating toward right wing nut jobs, even to the point of establishing imprints that deal exclusively with right wing trash.
     News Corps' Harper Collins, which is almost entirely right wing, owns Zondervan, a Christian imprint. Adam Bellow, shameful son of Nobel laureate Saul Bellow, makes his home there.You'd be more than hard-pressed to find a single imprint in the Big Five publishing houses that's similarly founded a left wing imprint. Go ahead, look for one. I'll wait here.
     We've come to expect the usual litany of assclowns on an annual basis- The Ann Coulters, the Sean Hannitys, the Bill O'Reillys, the Glenn Becks and so forth. Not to rationalize the dreadful judgment of publishers but at least those assholes have national visibility, TV gigs. And, yeah, up to a point we could even understand, in a contorted sort of way, the disastrous book deals given to Christine O'Donnell and Joe the Plumber.
     But what are we to make of internet troll Milo Yia Yanni (fuck it) getting a quarter of a million dollar book deal with Simon & Schuster today?
     Yes, boys and girls, that Milo.
     That would be the same self-loathing, racist, bigoted asshole who pounded Trump's campaign trail like Filipino twink ass on Two-For-One night, the same Breitbart "writer" who made headlines by claiming the Orlando night club shooting wasn't based on homophobia but Muslim culture (despite the shooter saying the exact opposite). The same Milo who got banned for life on Twitter and was consequently turned into some right wing martyr, the same Milo who went on a national "Dangerous Faggot" tour. The same Milo who humiliated a trans student by posting her image on a screen for hundreds to see. The same Milo who was banned from speaking at his former grade school by the UK's Anti Extremism Unit.
     Yes, that one. $250,000 for a piece of shit that got fast-tracked for a March 14, 2017 release (the usual turnaround time in the publishing business is a year and a half to two years, with Bantam having the shortest one at eight months). Apparently, with or without a literary agent (a prerequisite for the rest of us), this douchebag was probably carried into Simon and Schuster's executive offices on a litter and feted despite this:
I met with top execs at Simon & Schuster earlier in the year and spent half an hour trying to shock them with lewd jokes and outrageous opinions. I thought they were going to have me escorted from the building – but instead they offered me a wheelbarrow full of money.
     Yes, Milo tried to, pardon the unintentional pun, queer a deal with Simon & Schuster executives after being invited to speak with them and they dumped "a wheelbarrow full of money" at his feet.
     2016 was a shitty year to be a singer or actor but a great one for Breitbart bigots who just happen to be white men. Look where racist, misogynist, anti-Semite Steve Bannon is now.
     Granted, Milo got inked by Simon & Schuster's right wing Threshold Editions, the same assholes who'd published Dick Cheney's book. But by signing this guy to a quarter of a million dollar deal, Simon & Schuster confirms once again that executives, especially those in the publishing business, are just cynical shitheels who care less about doing the right thing and more about making lots of money in the short term no matter whose name is on the cover or how many people that person had hurt along the way.

(Addendum: Chances are, you've surfed in from Crooks and Liars thanks to Tengrain frontpaging me there for the second time in a few days. If you can spare some extra cash, Mrs. JP and I would greatly appreciate a donation as the holidays are looking a bit bleak these days.)


At December 29, 2016 at 1:52 PM, Blogger jurassicpork said...

Still stalking me 24/7, huh, "Greg"? You really are a pathetic piece of shit. Has no one ever told you this? If not, then you need new friends. Or friends at all. Or a hobby. Try basket weaving. I hear that's very enervating.

At December 29, 2016 at 10:40 PM, Anonymous CC said...

Don't conservatives complain about how much they're muzzled by the supposedly liberal media? Yet they seem to get so much airtime to voice their grievances.

At December 30, 2016 at 12:35 AM, Blogger jurassicpork said...

It's part and parcel with their persecution complex and need for incessant attention... a certain stalker I can think of who keeps crying in the wilderness despite knowing they're caterwauling to an audience of none.


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